When we moved into our house (tract home) in 1956 we still were bordered by orange groves. We played in them and picked oranges from the tree. The groves had been sold for more house lots and they were going to cut them down, so my mother said it wasn't stealing. In my immediate neighborhood were many families with young children, most had a girl within two years of my age. Most were traditional families. The dads worked full time and the moms stayed home, volunteered and watched the kids.

By chance, there were only two boys in the group, so I grew up unaware of the "no girls allowed" attitude prevalent in some areas. I never remember thinking that a boy could aspire to anything I couldn't. And when woman's lib became fashionable it wasn't relevant to me. In my life, the boys included us in all sports. They had to, in order to have enough people to make a team. We played tennisball workups (a baseball type game) in the circle in front of the cul-de-sac that bordered our neighborhood. Home plate was a sewer cover, and the bases were designated trees, curb markings, etc. We played football, tennis at the junior high, hide and seek late at night in the summer, and sneak, a game we made up similar to hide and seek. From the time I was in sixth grade, Jill and I used to walk all over Fullerton late at night. I never felt like I was in any danger. I know this doesn't have much to do with graduating high school, or 1969, but it is background that fits in.

Strangers were not menacing. People trusted most everybody. I remember a class in government in 1968 or 69 listening to the students discuss worldwide disarmament. Jean Taylor was saying that if we disarmed, of course the Russians would too. She said they didn't want war. They were just like us. I remember thinking, "how can we trust them? Some people in power want more power." Total disarmament would leave us defenseless and was pretty stupid, but I was in the minority.

Most of the students were real idealistic. We were also incredibly narcissistic. It embarrasses me even now to be a part of this generation. We think our music was the best, our recreation was the best, no other generation felt as purely and as strongly and as correctly as we did and we were the center of the universe. Drug use only heightened this self absorbed sense of importance. Many of us (while self-medicated) thought we felt and understood the mysteries of life. I never used drugs; I still don't even like to use medication at all. I dislike giving up any control. But, I saw it in some of my friends. I do not think the drug use was as wide spread as it is portrayed. Most likely a high percentage of media and entertainment people used drugs and so it seems normal to them. But, there were many like me, who didn't.

Adolescents in any era will always think their problems are unique. When I graduated I thought that the world was completely attainable. I was concerned about pollution and have always been aware of my responsibility to live as a tenant on the earth, and not the owner. Having grown up when we did duck and cover drills in elementary school and during the Cuban missile crisis, we imagined every plane that flew in the skies was a Russian bomber coming to get us, I was thrilled when the Berlin wall came down.

One thing that I was like all my fellow class of69'ers was that I never thought I would get old. I was wrong. It happened. I embarrass my kids just as much or more than my mom embarrassed me. I am glad I lived when I did. My kids never played out in the street. They don't know how it feels to walk to the store at 10:30 at night in the summer just to buy a shake (I wouldn't let them.) I rode the train to the beach before I got my license. It's a different world. And I don't think that the changes we made were all that good, but I still think that most people are.

Barbara (Black) Fox  jackefox@yahoo.com